He says to the last hotel clerk, "You've gotta have a room somewhere. Or just a bed, please, I'm really beat."

The clerk says, "Well, I do have a double room with only one occupant, and I'm sure he'd be glad to split the cost. But he snores so loudly that the people in the adjoining rooms have been complaining all week."

The guy says, "No problem, I'll take it."

The next morning the guy comes down to breakfast bright eyed and bushy tailed.

The manager says, "How'd you sleep with him snoring?"

The guy says, "I shut him up quick."

The manager says, "How'd you do that?"

The guy says, "He was already in bed snoring away when I came into the room. So I went over, gave him a big kiss on the cheek, and said, 'Good night, beautiful.' And he sat up and watched me all night."